Still sick and rain :(

Today was rainy and crappy and fit my mood ( and everyone elses at work) Everyone just seemed to be annoyed and stressed and it really wore on me since I was feeling so crappy. I had a hard time sleeping because of this cough, it's so annoying! So still going off of very little sleep and I just want to crawl into bed but there is so much to do! This week is crazy and I'm not looking forward to it at all.

I am stressed because his parents are coming on saturday and his mother is gluten free, sugar free tries to limit her dairy intake. My grandmother invited everyone over for lunch but I have NO idea what to cook for her, I just want her to be comfortable here and not feel sick while she is here, it's about a 2 hour drive here.

I am still feeling slightly nauseous at times and when I do feel hungry the moment I start to eat I feel sick, so it was very light eating tonight. Since I am so tired I don't have much to say, I have to go finish dishes and take a shower and then head to bed.

Tonight's picture is of my empty plate.. it was only a small piece of fish stuffed with crabmeat since I couldn't handle a whole...but damn it was yummy!

Birthday!

Wow last night was LONG but so much fun, I haven't seen my boyfriend smile and laugh like that in a long time and I really enjoyed myself. I had chicken tacos for dinner with a couple french fries but I was drinking red bull and vodkas.... not great for me but didn't have ANY soda, which is usually my normal bar drink.

I started off yesterday by making him a great breakfast of cinnamon vanilla french toast, cheesy scrambled eggs and bacon... I had 2 bites on the french toast (not really a fan) and a bite of eggs. I was still feeling sick so I had a baked sweet potato for lunch. Trying to drink as much water as possible until I feel better and can eat more. I feel fine but when I start eating I feel so sick and everything bothers my stomach... even after dinner last night I was afraid I would have to leave early but I pushed through it.

We all had a great time and came back to our apartment and played some card games, talked and watched TV. I finally hit the bed at about 4am but never fell asleep until 5 and was up at about 7:30 cooking breakfast again... I was fine until about an hour ago when it hit me, I had plans to go walk at a local park with my sister and her family but my head cold is killing me!! I had two small biscuits, some scrapple and eggs for breakfast... my stomach has revolted since then... we are suppose to go out again tonight... but we'll see.

My pictures for this weekend are... the breakfast I made for his yesterday and the bill from last night!



Br

Beach day!

Today was another crazy day! I am still not feeling well and my eating was all over the place... I was starving this morning and then not hungry during the day and then I was so ready for dinner.. ugg I hate feeling this way because it makes my weight go all over the place. Plus I am SO stressed about tomorrow and planning my boyfriends birthday.

I will say that at least I had fun at work...it was beach day! We had the kids in their bathing suits and we had beach balls, lays and all sorts of stuff. I got all decked out and we made a whole day out of it, I even brought in a special treat for my kids, popsicles! They laid out their beach towels and enjoyed a great afternoon snack.

I don't have much to say today but I will try really hard to blog tomorrow and sunday but with everything we have planned...it's going to be hard... I have to keep at this, it's been helping so much!

My picture tonight is of the outfit I wore to work...just another reason I love working with kids...this was totally acceptable beach day wear!

New dinner recipe

Today was not a good day eating wise.... I got so caught up in having my boyfriend home last night that I forgot to make my breakfast or lunch for today but figured I'd get up early and do it in the morning. Then I woke up and felt like crap! I hit my alarm twice and before you know it had to get out the door...no food in hand. I was carving Mcdonalds so I stopped and got 3 has browns and had them for my breakfast... and that was it. I had a bottle of Propel Zero that I sipped on for the rest of the day. I had no lunch or money for lunch so I just didn't eat.... my stomach didn't really mind because this cough I have is making me super nauseous. I had about 10 wheat thins while the kids were snacking and that was it. I came home and was hungry!! Luckily we had a crock pot meal going...Hawaiian chicken here from sparkpeople. I had one piece with some left over mac and cheese and corn from last night. I also had 2 wedges of babybell for about 100 calories.

My stomach is still not feeling so great and I sound like a dog when I cough...just in time for my boyfriends birthday this weekend. I hate this. We have so many sick kids and most of the parents can't afford to keep their kids home because they have to work. So in turn I ended up getting sick but I can't take time off either because I can't afford it. It's a big viscous circle. I am already in my PJs just relaxing on the couch, I am going to make my breakfast and lunch before I head to bed in a little bit.

I was proud because I turned down ordering lunch out (saving my money!) and a cupcake! I also tried to keep a positive attitude all day and it worked for the most part. So glad tomorrow is Friday and really looking forward to this weekend!

Tonight's picture is of my yummy dinner, the chicken was so tender I loved it! A good way to get in some extra fruit servings!

A lovely dinner

Today was pretty good eating wise, I still had trouble snacking on some wheat thins and cheez its but I just have to learn to deal with these things in my classroom and not take a handful when the children are eating snack. I felt a little sick today pretty sure it's a chest thing when I cough it hurts and my throat is kind of sore. As you can see I didn't make my bed time tonight but I had reasons.

For the first night in awhile my boyfriend was home from work ( he took the day off to do some things) and I just wanted to cuddle with him as much as possible, I hate not seeing him during the week it makes for a very lonely girl. He had dinner already made when I came home, steak, mac and cheese and corn. It was WONDERFUL not to come home and make dinner or think about it, I miss him so much!

It was so nice because he had our candle lit and we sat at our little table in the living room and just talked. These are the nights that make me want to be happy again and feel comfortable with myself because I want to be comfortable around him. We also watched I Used To Be Fat on MTV and she ran a 5k at the end of her show. I have a 5k coming up on Mother's day and this makes me miss running so much. He told me I just have to go do it... and I do!

Tonight's picture is of our lovely candle we ate dinner by

It's a good start...

I went to my Dr and it was nice to hear her confirm that I'm not crazy and that it really is my depression and she put me back on my medicine. I told her about my weight and eating issues and she wants me to try my medicine for a month, see if that helps and if I still feel unable to control my eating habits she will refer me to a nutritionist but she thinks this will really help get me back on track.

Work was okay, I really do have some great co-workers who make life much easier and keep me laughing when I need it the most. I am trying to just keep my head up about things, keep the annoying things ( and people) at bay in my mind and move forward. We are celebrating my boyfriends birthday this weekend and I am really looking forward to it because I have a couple of surprises for him.

I am on my TOM so I am eating WAY more then I should but again it's just that "I don't care" mood, but I'm trying to at least make some healthy choices and limit the unhealthy ones. Breakfast this morning was 2 eggs scrambled with some shredded mozzarella cheese and orange peppers on a tortilla with some ketchup and half a large apple. I snacked through the day on some wheat thins and a whole wheat blueberry muffin. Lunch was a couple pieces of roasted chicken on whole wheat bread with a little bit of mayo and the other half of my apple. I also had a handful of cherry tomatoes and a wedge of babybell cheese. Dinner was at my dad's tonight and that was pork, green beans, mix of carrots, cauliflower, broccoli and red peppers and some mac and cheese. I also had like 7 Hershey kisses with almond inside YUM! I also ate some cookies as a snack tonight...boo!

Oh well I'm off to prep my breakfast and lunch for tomorrow and get my clothes ready. My boyfriend has to be up early and I know we will be bumping into each other as we get ready so I want to be extra prepared, I have to be in early tomorrow again!

Tonight's picture is of the promise ring my boyfriend gave me 2 Christmases ago, it fit perfectly when I first got it and over the 3 or 4 months I noticed it has gotten loose. Some times it feels like it will slip right off! It's beautiful and I love wearing it everyday!

New bedtime!

Today was quiet at work, we only had 5 kids, I could have managed the classroom myself but I let my directors know we had a lot to do and didn't want to lose my assistant. So they let me keep her but with attitude of course.

We got a lot done and had a lot of laughs which I really needed! Then we went and got our nails done (YAY for gift certificates!) and then grabbed some pizza. We shared a personal mushroom pizza and some fries. But I felt good about the sharing and I had some water to go with it. I didn't hit the gym but I'm still trying to get back to my eating.

I see my doctor tomorrow and I am actually feeling really relieved about it, I want to tell her so much about everything and see if she can really help me. I just want to feel like myself again!

I feel like this will be a good week for me, I'm going to make it a good week!!!

My picture tonight is of my bedtime... I'm heading to bed as soon as I am done writing this blog! I am trying to get to bed before 10pm every night this week!!!